Simon Woods is a man of dubious taste with little to no skill for effectively managing time, space, or any other dimension. He also likes to use words incorrectly, if for nothing else than the exquisite joy of seeing people care enough to get annoyed about it. There’s also a chance that doing the ‘words’ thing is difficult and laziness feels so damned good. He’s lucky enough to live with Claire Field, an infinitely patient and dizzyingly talented fiancée, in a city that is known for a collection of insects who continue to be quite popular many years after their death. Every day is made even better by the company of two cats, one of a delicate nature and the other of a kind you are likely to see with the Muppets.
The effort to work is often characterised by an inability to make substantial progress one way or the other but Simon has at least improved his ability to recognise this in a practical manner. There are points when it seems best to give up but then life wouldn’t be very interesting without challenges, and so he perseveres. To this day it is likely his most impressive achievement.
For those who have taken the time to read this he apologises. Please know that it was excruciating to write.
Especially the three paragraphs before this one.